Bud: Woohoo! Now that’s the way to travel! Totally awesome!

Submarine: Heh, heh. How do you really feel?

Bud: H-hey, no backtalk! Full speed ahead!

Submarine: Aye-aye, captain!

Bud: Huh? Wait, I don’t remember anyone turning into a ship like that…

Navy Commanding Officer: Find out who they are now!

Navy Officer: Right! Unidentified vessel, stop immediately and identify yourself. This is your only warning!

Bud: Oh no! Oh man! Those ships are from the real navy!

Submarine: The what?

Navy Officer: Unidentified vessel, we have no choice but to fire!

Bud: No! Wait! Hold on! Don’t do anything! Hh! Dive!

Submarine: Don’t have to tell me twice!

Navy Commanding Officer: Whoa, did you see that?!

Navy Officer: And I saw a kid on that sub!

Navy Commanding Officer: You know what, maybe we just didn’t see anything.

Navy Officer: …But…!

Navy Commanding Officer: We didn’t see anything!

Navy Officer: Y-yessir!

Bud: Now that was totally not awesome.

[Transition]

Coby: Okay guys, today we’re learning parallel parking. All you gotta do is back into that space over there, okay?

Red Car: No problem. Check it out. Like this?

Coby: No way, man! Definitely not like that! Huh? Real cars can’t do stuff like that.

Red Car: Bo-ring.

Coby: If you want to stay hidden, you’d better be boring!

Red Car: It may be too late.

Coby: What?

Guy #1: Cool cars!

Coby: Huh?

Guy #2: Who makes these?

Coby: Uhhh…

Guy #3: Whoa, check out those cars.

Coby: Hmmm.. Heh, heh, heh. Actually, I designed these bad boys.

Guy #1: No way…

Guy #2: Are they wicked fast?

Coby: Uh, yeah. Y’see, I made these cars with a voice recognition program that responds to the environment around them. It’s almost like they’re alive…

Officer: Are these your cars?

Coby: That’s right. Hmm? Huh?! Uh, what’s wrong?

Officer: I gotta admit, these are some good looking cars you have. But these drafting bins on the back, they make these cars illegal.

Coby: Uh, yeah. Y’see, they’re actually radio controlled cars.

Officer: But they’re as big as a real car. There’s even a steering wheel and everything inside here. Hey, wait a minute, how come you don’t have a remote control?

Coby: Oh, that. Well, y’see… I don’t actually need a remote control because these cars are programmed to respond to voice commands.

Officer: Really? I’d like to see that.

Coby: O-kay, I’ll give you a demonstration.

Officer: Great!

Coby: Y-yeah… Just follow my lead. Okay, ya got it?

Blue Car: Got it.

Coby: Start your engine!

Officer: Whoa, that’s cool!

Coby: You don’t have to tell me, I invented it! Watch this. Drive! Stop!

Crowd: Whoa!

Coby: Is that the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen or what? No need to answer.

Officer: Well, they’re just cars.

Coby: Can a normal car spin?

Crowd: Whoa!

Coby: Or dance?!

Officer: Whoa! I’ve never seen such a — huh? Huh?! Where’d he go?!

Coby: Sorry if I — you know — caused any trouble here! But it’s time for me to go!

Crowd: Yeah! All right! Whoo!

Officer: But… I never got a chance to ask him where I could get one of those.

[Transition]

Old Man: Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm… Hmm?! Is that a… traffic light?! Who needs a traffic light if there’s no traffic?!

Traffic Light: Don’t even think about running this light.

Old Man: Huh? What? What? Who said that?!

Traffic Light: Oh, uh, nobody. Light’s green, move it along.

Old Man: I’m going! I ain’t never coming back!

Lori: Word of advice… Traffic lights don’t talk.

Traffic Light: What, never? And I’m supposed to do this all day long?

Lori: Either that, or go home and get sucked into a black hole.

Traffic Light: That’s a good point.

[Transition]

Jetfire: Listen, we appreciate all your help, but we’re supposed to be hiding here, not trying to get noticed.

Lori: Wait a minute, don’t look at me. At least I didn’t suggest being a submarine!

Jetfire: A submarine?!

Bud: It makes perfect sense. If you’re underwater, no one can see you. Except…

Jetfire: Except what?

Bud: Except they can see you just fine when you come to the surface.

Jetfire: Ahhh-hohhhh…

Lori: I don’t know what you were thinking, Bud. The Autobots need our help, not lame ideas.

Bud: Egh.

Coby: Look who’s talking about lame ideas. A traffic light in the middle of the desert, c’mon.

Lori: Oh yeah? Well, that’s way better than a square dance for cars in a parking lot.

Coby: Ha! Shows what you know! They were breakdancing!

Jetfire: Ohhh…

[Transition]

Optimus: This has to work. We’re running out of options to shut down that black hole.

Scattorshot: I’ll keep my fingers crossed!

Optimus: Any word from Red Alert on the containment operation?

Hot Shot: Coming in now.

Red Alert: Optimus, we’re almost ready here. The gravitron grid is now in place. Hopefully when it’s activated, it will generate a gravity wave strong enough for the black hole to collapse in on itself.

Optimus: What do you think our chances are?

Red Alert: There’s a sixty percent chance of success, but the amount of energy in that black hole seems to increase every time we do a sensor reading. This may have no chance at all.

Scattorshot: Oh, this just keeps getting better…

Jetfire: Ohhh…

Hot Shot: Hmm? Good timing! We’re just about to slam that black hole shut.

Jetfire: What? Oh.

Hot Shot: Hey, is something wrong, Jetfire?

Jetfire: This mission, hiding here on Earth… Even if we can find places for all our refugees, it’s just a matter of time before one of them is discovered. And the only help we have… is three human kids.

Hot Shot: C’mon… Those kids gave us a chance by helping us out, now why don’t you give them one?

Jetfire: Yeah, yeah, yeah…

Red Alert: We’re ready, Optimus.

Optimus: Let’s do it.

Red Alert: I copy that. I’m powering up the gravitron net cluster right now.

Scattorshot: C’mon, c’mon…

Red Alert: The containment grid has been established. Now activating the gravity generators. It’s starting to work! The gravity field is squeezing in on the black hole! If the grid can just hold together!

Scattorshot: The black hole’s energy field is shrinking! It’s working! I can’t believe something’s actually going right for once.

Red Alert: Wait! We’re getting power fluctuations! No! The gravitron nodes are overloading!

Scattorshot: Ohhh…!

Red Alert: Hold on! I’ll try to re-route power! It’s no use… The grid is collapsing. We’ve failed. Maybe nothing can stop this black hole from consuming the universe.

[Transition]

Red Alert: Maybe we can try again after re-calculating the greater forces.

Optimus: Hmmm…

Red Alert: I dunno…

Scattorshot: Man! Ergh!

Vector Prime: Will you not listen? We already know the solution.

Scattorshot: Huh?

Vector Prime: Only the Cyber Planet Keys can seal the black hole.

Hot Shot: Eghhh…

Jetfire: I dunno… Just saying it’s the only answer doesn’t make it so. Maybe we can find another answer.

Hot Shot: Yeah, no offense, but this is a whole different world than what you were dealing with.

Red Alert: I’m not sure.

Hot Shot: Hmm?

Jetfire: Huh? What do you mean, Red Alert?

Hot Shot: Yeah, what’s the deal? I mean if you’ve got something to say, just come right out and say it.

Red Alert: The only way we’ll ever find a solution is — is to consider every possibility. Nothing that we’ve ever tried is right. Perhaps Vector Prime is right.

Hot Shot: All right…

Red Alert: But even if we find that he’s not right, we should at least listen to what he has to say. Remember, Vector Prime has been around much longer than we have. He has knowledge that we don’t, and we just can’t toss that aside.

Optimus: Right. Then we’ll make the search for the Cyber Planet Keys our number one priority. But Red Alert, we still need other solutions incase we can’t find the keys. We must succeed.

[Transition]

Coby: Listen, Jetfire. We’re sorry about messing things up before, but we’ll try harder from now on.

Lori: Yeah, you guys don’t have to worry, okay?

Bud: ‘Cause we’re gonna work together to figure out a way to hide all you guys on Earth. Right?

Lori & Coby: Mmmhmm.

Coby: The important word here is “hide,” so — I hate to say it, but — you’re gonna have to be just a plain car.

Bud: Wait, it’s gonna look weird if no one’s driving it, don’t you think?

Coby: Yeah, that’s a good idea!

Lori: Whatever these Cybertronians turn into, it has to be something real simple; something you see all the time.

Bud: Like traffic lights in the middle of nowhere!

Lori: Don’t start, small fry!

Jetfire: This just might work after all… Yeah… Heh, heh, heh…

Scattorshot: Jetfire!

Jetfire: Yes? What is it?

Scattorshot: We need you. It’s an emergency!

Jetfire: I’m here, Scattorshot! What’s going on?

Scattorshot: We picked up this communication from an Air Force patrol.

ATC #1: Radar’s picked up an unidentified flying object in our airspace.

ATC #2: Roger that. We’ve picked up the bogey here too. We’ve scrambled two jets to engage the target. They’re on their way.

Jetfire: Unidentified flying object? Is it an Autobot or a Decepticon? Can ya tell who it is?

Scattorshot: Just a sec. Bad guy, good guy, bad guy… Bad guy! It’s Thundercracker!

Jetfire: And I’ll bet he’s up to no good. We have to stop ‘im!

[Transition]

Thundercracker: Now where are those pesky little Autobots at? They gotta be around here somewhere! When I find ’em, it’s “bye-bye, Autobots” and “hello, right-hand man for Megatron.” I just wish finding ’em wasn’t so blastin’ hard!

Pilot #1: I have visual contact with the bogey. We’re moving in.

Thundercracker: Whoa! Something’s on my tail! Well, well, lookie here! I guess some humans want to play with me.

Pilot #1: How’d he get around behind us?! Dive! Dive!

Thundercracker: Do whatever you want, ain’t gonna save ya! Heh!

Pilot #1: We can’t outmaneuver him!

Thundercracker: Gee, you’re quick! But not quick enough to outrace my missile! Whoa! Who did that?!

Jetfire: Leave these humans alone.

Thundercracker: Jetfire?!

Jetfire: That’s right. These humans are under my protection.

Thundercracker: Ooh, I’m shakin’ in my boots.

Pilot #1: Incoming!

Thundercracker: You’re a stone cold fool, Jetfire!

Jetfire: Coming from you, that’s a compliment.

Thundercracker: Tell ya what, here’s another little something coming from me. Whoa!

Pilot #1: That plane can’t handle that kind of punishment for too long. Pilot! Get out of here before it’s too late! Pilot, do you copy?!

Optimus: Hold on, Jetfire, we’re on our way!

Thundercracker: See ya never, Jetfire!

Jetfire: Aah!

Optimus: Jetfire!

Thundercracker: That’s what I’m talkin’ about! Huh…? Jetfire’s okay?! Shoot! He even looks more than okay!

Vector Prime: That’s a… Cyber Key…! It came without him even needing to call it forth.

Jetfire: Jetfire, Cyber Key Power! What is this?

Thundercracker: It ain’t enough to save ya, that’s what!

Jetfire: Is that supposed to scare me, Thundercracker?!

Thundercracker: Aaah!

Jetfire: Hold on… Was that really…

Optimus: Yes, a Cyber Key. Is that going to happen every time we need extra power? Vector Prime?

Vector Prime: Perhaps.

Jetfire: I hope so! That was amazing!

Thundercracker: At least I’ll take care of these humans!

Vector Prime: You shall not! Hwaah!

Pilot #2: What is that?!

Thundercracker: Where’d they go?!

Pilot #1: Where are we?! And what was that big robot thing with the sword?!

Pilot #2: I… I dunno! But when we get back, I’m taking a loooong vacation!

Vector Prime: Now we may face each other fairly.

Thundercracker: Forget that… Who wants to fight fair?

Jetfire: Transform!

Optimus: Wait! Jetfire! Come back! Aah! Huh? Megatron! Starscream!

Jetfire: You won’t escape, Thundercracker!

Thundercracker: Wanna bet?!

Jetfire: Yeah! I think I do!

Thundercracker: Eraaugghhh…

Jetfire: I’m takin’ you down, Thundercracker! You can run, but you can’t hide… Actually, you can’t even run!

Thundercracker: Back off, rustbucket! Fire! Aah! Who did thaaaaat?!

Scattorshot: Nice one, Scattorshot. You’re welcome.

[Transition]

Vector Prime: Ergh! Ugh!

Optimus: Vector Prime! No!

Megatron: Worry about yourself, Optimus Prime.

Optimus: Aaaaahhh! Ugh! Urgh…

Starscream: Uh-uh-uh-uhhh…!

Optimus: Give me back the planet map, Megatron.

Vector Prime: Hhh.

Optimus: You’re nothing better than a common thief!

Megatron: Soon enough I’ll be ruler of the universe. I care not what vermin like you think of me.

Optimus: We don’t have time for this, Megatron. Now… hand it over!

Starscream: Did you get dropped on your head or something? The map’s ours, get used to it.

Optimus: Don’t you understand? If we don’t stop that black hole, the whole universe will be destroyed!

Megatron: Ha! You’re a fool.

Optimus: Listen!

Megatron: I’ve already listened to you far too long. Try, though, as you might, you will never be able to stop me. And with the power of the Cyber Planet Keys, the universe will be mine.

Optimus: I will stop you. Ergh!

Starscream: Aah! Oohwah!

Optimus: You had your chance, Megatron, but now you’re done. Optimus Prime, super mode! Aaaayah!

Starscream: Is that the best you got? Try this! Hahahaha! And I thought he’d be harder to defeat… Oh well. Huh? What is that?!

Optimus: Optimus Prime, Cyber Key Power!

Starscream: Nooooo! Raugh! Ugh, ugh!

Optimus: Now… give me the map!

Megatron: Never.

Optimus: Your selfishness will destroy us all, Megatron. If you won’t give me the map, I’ll take it!

Megatron: Errr…!

Optimus: Uggggghhhh!

Megatron: Don’t you see?! You can’t win!

Optimus: I have to! I don’t have any choice!

Megatron: Very well.

Hot Shot: Optimus.

Megatron: Hmm?

Scattorshot: The cavalry has arrived!

Megatron: More meddling Autobots. Mmph!

Optimus: Aaaaahhh!

Starscream: Let’s take care of ’em once and for all!

Megatron: Don’t bother. All that matters is the Cyber Planet Keys and soon we will have our first one.

Vector Prime: Are you saying… you’ve already located the first Cyber Planet Key?!

Megatron: That’s right. As usual, you Autobots are a step behind me. But don’t feel bad, you never really had a chance. Hahahaha!

Optimus: No…

Megatron: Farewell, fools!

Starscream: And the next time that we meet, it will be your last.

Optimus: We shall see.

[Transition]

Hot Shot: Are you all right, Optimus?

Optimus: I’m fine. Don’t worry about me, we have bigger problems on our hands. Listen, it’s imperative that we find those keys before the Decepticons. Vector Prime, is it possible to find them without the map?

Vector Prime: Hmmm… Well, if we can unlock the secrets of the Omega Lock, perhaps.

Optimus: If that’s what we need to do, we’ll do it. And we must hurry, the stakes are too high for us to fail.

[Transition]

Pilot #1: Then somehow we’re over the Bermuda Triangle. I can’t explain it, sir!

Franklin: So let me get this straight. A giant robot with a sword teleported you?

Pilot #1: Yessir, I know. I can hardly believe it myself.

Franklin: Oh, I believe you, son. I’ve seen some things that could turn your hair white. But I can’t talk about them, just like you can’t talk about what you saw. It’s classified, top secret. If you tell anyone, the only flying you’ll ever do — is at an amusement park. Got it?

Pilot #1: Yessir, but what was that thing anyway?

Franklin: It’s classified, top secret.

Pilot #1: Yessir, I know. But what was that thing anyway?

Franklin: It was nothing at all, pilot. Understand?

Pilot #1: Yessir… I do.

Franklin: Looks like I’m going to Bermuda. Yeah.

[Transition]

Coby: Okay, who’s next?

Pickup Truck: Me!

Coby: Great! Transform into this.

Pickup Truck: Hey, I like that.

Coby: It’s nothing flashy, but it’ll get the job done.

Hot Shot: All right! Lookin’ good!

Coby: I know! Wait until I have you change into a washing machine.

Hot Shot: Ha, ha, ha, ha… Good one, Coby!

Overhaul: Hey, what’s going on with those two?

Bud: If you get disguises, so do I! Bewwwww! Huhh! Hmmmm… Heh, heh, heh.

Lori: Quit playing around. We still have a job to do.

Bud: Okay…

Lori: Huh?

Jolt: Check this out!

Bud: See, look at that handsome guy!

Lori: Yeah, maybe you should play around more.

Bud: Heheheh…

Jetfire: Wow, this is much better than before.

Coby: Hey, thanks! Hopefully this’ll keep you guys outta trouble.

Lori: Okay, my turn! I’m gonna teach you guys all the traffic laws. We’re gonna start with traffic lights, okay? So what do you do when you see — this colour?

Civilian Autobots: You go.

Lori: And this colour?

Civilian Autobots: You go less.

Lori: C’mon.

Civilian Autobots: You stop.

Optimus: You know, Jetfire, we couldn’t do this without them.

Jetfire: Yeah, I know. We just might be able to pull this thing off after all.

[Transition]

Megatron: Velocitron, the speed planet, resting place of the first Cyber Planet Key. Soon nothing will stand in my way. Heh, heh, heh, heh…

[End]

Episode Notes

-Multiple lines in the Franklin scene appear to have been recycled.

-This is the only episode which has aired to date to refer to Speed Planet as “Velocitron.”